Farewell Fare Well

10/28/2013


.

My posts are coming very far between.

I think of you my blog friends.

I feel like I kept you hanging. Thank you for hanging around though.

It has been a crazy schedule and let me share to you how crazy it is, here.

20131026_202429[1]

My holidays are planned already, 24/27.

I need to refocus. I need to inventory my life.

I am sorry that I need to say farewell to this refuge and to you my blog friends.

I started blogging when I decided that I needed to move on from a very painful season of my life.

Thank you for coming to my life one by one. Thank you for lifting me up, for understanding, and yes, for loving me just as I am.

I have moved on but that is not to say that I no longer hurt each time there are triggers to remind me.

But thank God, He is always there to comfort me.

And now I am moving on, again.

Shall we take one last look of how the spoons were bent?

arrrgghhhh

arrrgghhhh

aaahhhhhh

aaahhhhhh

uuuhhhhh

uuuhhhhh

easy huh! :) :) :) :(

easy huh! 🙂 🙂 🙂 😦

.

The benders have grown now. Look what happened to them after three years — so fast.

BKids.June2013

They continue to bloom wonderfully. Thank God.

.

20131020_185959[1]

Got to create memories together with them.

.

Fabia Paintings.Oct 2013

Blend into the colors of their lives.

.

So this is it. Farewell to bended spoon. No, it won’t evolve to bent spoon. I liked it that way, when some still appreciates despite the imperfection.

Farewell bended spoon.

Fare well my friends. Bloom.

Bloom Painting

.

Fare well. Fare well. Fare well.

Bloom. Bloom. Bloom.

.

The desert and the parched land will be glad; the wilderness will rejoice and blossom. Like the crocus, it will burst into bloom; it will rejoice greatly and shout for joy. The glory of Lebanon will be given to it, the splendor of Carmel and Sharon; they will see the glory of the Lord, the splendor of our God. – Isaiah 35:1-2

🙂

Bittersweet

08/20/2013


Knee-deep.

Waist-deep.

Chest-deep.

That’s how high the flood in some areas in the city due to tropical storm Maring (international name – Trami). Classes were suspended but since it’s not signal number 3, the working masses still need to go to their respective offices – if we can.

I can’t. The garage is flooded. Outside it’s flooded.

I can’t float in the flood. I can’t swim through the flood. I can’t fly over the flood.

I can only work at home.

Bittersweet. Not because I am working at home – I am used to it, working — beyond my working hours.

Bittersweet. Us, here, experiencing several storms in a year – the one before this, Labuyo (Utor), visited us just last week. I won’t talk about bitterness — just bittersweet. Because these storms oftentimes bring out the best in us.

We continuously learn how to rebuild.

We continuously hold on to the One who can calm the storms.

Bittersweet — I remember I have this book title by Shauna Niequist . And the first thing that I read was ‘on crying in the bathroom’ because I did cried in the bathroom. Not once, nor twice. Too many times – because it’s less messy to cry in the bathroom!

I can relate in most of the entries, not only because I too had a miscarriage, but because I know how bittersweet taste — and I know you do too.

So many bittersweet thoughts for the day and one of them is — my blog friends. I haven’t been a good friend for a long time. I was not able to visit them as much and when I did, some are no longer writing actively as well.

I know. I know. Our priorities do change as the need arises. We sometimes need to give up something in order to focus on to another thing. Bittersweet.

And like Shauna I also ask for help — to the One who truly knows my heart.

.

'on crying in the bathroom' by Shauna Niequist

‘on crying in the bathroom’ by Shauna Niequist

.

Yes, I would like to believe that too even though the storm outside is not leaving today.

Even though there is a storm inside.

Heart-deep.

Wish-deep.

Knee-dip.

.

‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” – Revelation 21:4

🙂


Once upon a time, there was a line between hubby and me.

Line of destructive priorities.

Line of selfishness.

Line of pride.

Line of shame.

Line of hatred. Yes. Yes. Yes.

There was a cross.

I saw the cross differently back then.

And so I wanted to run away from it.

After all it was heavy and left me bleeding inside.

But I wasn’t able to go far. It was painful to walk away wounded and bleeding.

I needed a healer.

And then I saw the cross anew

It stitched my wounds.

It helped me cross the line of surrender.

It brought me to the Healer.

.

Drawn To The Crossby L. Mirabueno

Drawn To The Cross
by L. Mirabueno

.

I had the painting commissioned. I want to be reminded when I was drawn to the cross and not away from it. That there is no point in running away because love is all it is. It is not just cupid’s love but the love of the Father and the Son for mankind — for us sinners.

Jesus saved us on the cross. It is not a lovely sight knowing that the Father is grieving but — He loves us.

Jesus saved us on the cross. He took our shame and He is not ashamed — He loves us.

And where is my hubby in all of these?

In the title! 🙂

.

You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. – Romans 5:6

🙂


BUY, PICK, LUST!

Every day I am confronted in the road by screaming billboards. Reminding me that I have yet to own the latest in fashion and technology; that I have yet to achieve the silkiest skin and society’s dream body; that their cake is chocolatier and the chicken is crispier.

It made me breathe less or shall I say that my breathing is heavier, harder  — “Chocolate cake or dream body? Latest in fashion or crispy chicken?” It’s hard to satisfy advertisers at the same time — more so if you are not at all interested but somehow compelled to want it.

I dream of regular road travels that will leave me breathless of nature’s beauty and abundance. And today I want to thank Artist Stephen Glassman for his dream of putting a crack in the urban skyline and allow us to take a breath despite the traffic.

Urban Air will transform existing old urban billboards to breathing spaces with suspended bamboo gardens.

 

To make this come true at least $100,000.00 pledges is needed — and then the project will be funded. Please check the team behind the project in their  KickStarter page.

I can’t wait to see similar project here in the Philippines.

I can’t wait to see a whispering billboard reminding me to BREATHE, PRAISE, LOVE.

.

Let everything that has breath praise the LORD. Praise the LORD. – Psalm 150:6

🙂

Super Storm

11/01/2012


waves by Sandy — yahoo news Oct 27, 2012

 

To those who are affected by super storm Sandy, my prayers are with you.

I was worried in the thought that some might not be used to storms and its effect thus might be greatly devastated. But then I realized that we are all humans equipped with coping mechanism by no less than our Mighty Creator. Yes, that’s only how far we can go alone, coping — getting by. But living with life (there’s living like dead, right?) is only possible with God.

I myself have been through so many storms since I was conceived up to now — be it life’s storms that hits like nothing else or the powerful wind and rain that hit Philippines 20 times a year on the average.

Looking back, I realized how much I appreciated storms when I was a little girl. After candle lit nights due to power outage I would excitedly go out and appreciate the brighter surroundings — brighter because some trees fell or branches were broken. I would go around picking fallen fruits and coconuts and was so excited when I found a turtle! I was aware that there was damage but my young eyes were appreciative of the clean up.

When I got older, especially when I became a mom, it was different. There were worries on possible shortage of food or drowning in the flood. There were worries on severance of relationships and drowning in despair.

There is worry until there is trust in the Lord. Until I talk with the Lord. Until I connect with the Lord.

As human, there is only so much that I can do. The more I worry of what I cannot do, the more I am not able to do what I can do — like entrusting my worries to the Lord.

I am worried about you — and I am entrusting you to the Lord who can carry us through storms and give the warmest comfort.

*

He stilled the storm to a whisper; the waves of the sea were hushed. – Psalm 107:29

.


I miss you all too!

And yes from time to time I pause and think of you and pray for you my dear blog friends.

The heart strings were not cut. They were turned into lovely friendship bows.

The times that were used to be spent online were added to more hugs, kisses, sharing stories, crafting, smiling, walking around, counting blessings, and smelling the armpits of my kiddos.

It was all good. Soooo good. Very very very good.

It is such a blessing to be a mom. Just one kid brings so much joy. And I have four!

And today I read that around 50,000 children go missing yearly in India. That is 14 children missing everyday — infinite heartaches each second.

Pinky and Dinesh Kumar Singh pose with a photograph of their missing child Shivam Singh at their residence in New Delhi, on September 12. Thirteen-year-old Shivam Singh promised his mother he would be back to do his homework as he ran to get some sweets. He never returned, becoming one of the 50,000 children who go missing every year in IndiaThis combination picture taken on September 12, shows Indian women Ranjana Singh (left) posing with a photograph of her missing child Saket Kumar, while Pinky and Dinesh Kumar Singh (right) posing with a photograph of their missing child Shivam Singh

The photographs of missing Indian children are displayed at a police station in New Delhi. According to recent crime statistics, 14 children go missing in New Delhi every day, at least six of whom are victims of human traffickingReligious threads adorn a photograph of missing Indian child, Shivam Singh, at his family's residence in New Delhi, pictured on September 12. Thirteen-year-old Shivam Singh promised his mother he would be back to do his homework as he ran to get some sweets. He never returned, becoming one of the 50,000 children who go missing every year in India

(Photos from the News)

The kids are missing due to human trafficking. And this surely is not happening in India alone. We have our own numbers in our own backyard. It makes my heart ache as a mom and as human. What happened to our own kind, the adults? What happened to their hearts?

I pray that each one will hear God’s word. And feel God’s heart. Then feel their own. And know that God is in the heart business. He cleans, He restores, He makes new, and He loves.

Let us all give tight hugs, real tight hugs to all the children of the world.

Let us whisper that they are loved so much by God. Some might not believe it, like most of us do at some point in our lives, but still let us whisper. One day that whisper will be heard — loud and clear.

*

All your children shall be taught by the LORD, and great shall be the peace of your children. – Isaiah 54:13

 

.

Adios Amigos

08/14/2012


It’s been weeks since I last visited your place and my place.

I am tempted to finally say, “Adios Amigos.”

But here I am saying instead, “Ahhh Diyos Amigos!”

Diyos is the Filipino translation for God.

“It’s God my friends!”

Who else will stop the flood caused by 11 straight days of monsoon rain?

.

 

.

Who else will make Filipinos smile in hope?

.

.

 Who else will provide what you need most?

.

.

Who else will soak  you in love?

.

 .

Who else will make one fit for the ohlifepics?

.

 .

Who else will lay down his life for us?

.

.

Ahhh Diyos Amigos!

.

Where ever you are right now — down the deep or floating on air

Whatever you may be doing right now — laughing in pain or crying in happiness

We both know that God alone knows His purpose for us — and it is good.

I believe that even when I feel like something so bad is happening to me.

I believe that feelings are not always the truth — but He is.

I choose to believe because…

it’s raining hard again outside! 🙂

Ahhh Diyos Amigos!

.

The waters saw you, O God, the waters saw you and writhed; the very depths were convulsed. -Psalm 7:16

.

Note: Photos are not mine as I can’t be everywhere while there’s flood. 🙂